Your life is well-balanced, you are healthy, you have a job, a companion, serene children, a family, holiday opportunities, you are financially stable: apparently, there is nothing missing, yet something is wrong. A part of you lives an impalpable torment that generates a state of dissatisfaction. Everything you have built up and wanted until now does not satisfy you anymore, and you feel out-of-place. What’s going on? Where do these vibrations and restlessness that moves you without apparent reason come from? Whose voice is the one that unceasingly screaming trying to communicate messages you do not understand?
That is the voice of a new identity that is being widened. Within you, between inner conflicts, emotional blocks and resistance there is a rising entity that rushes to get out and discover life. But there is fear that holds it. The fear of starting to say no, the fear of starting to defend your values, the fear of choosing yourself as a priority and being judged selfish, the fear of starting to dream. You have said “yes” too often when you wanted to say “no”, not to disappoint, not to betray the expectations of those who tacitly demand your presence. It is not arrogance or selfishness to start living without masks by following what are your own values and priorities. It is helpful to stop pretending to belong to a dimension that oppresses us: it is dignity towards yourself and respect for those who believe you are different from who you really are. Of course, it can be scary and could create pain to show for what you really are, but we all have the right to choose to be happy and to be able to follow that path, the first step is to learn to set free from guilt.
- Do not pretend to be another person. Living with a mask creates long-term tension and pain. Each “mask” has its own leak that lets drip our true identity. Continually seeking to hide it requires a huge amount of energy, that in the long run will drain you completely.
- Listen to yourself. Take time to stay silent to get in touch with your inner self and “feel” yourself. Choose a moment of the day and go out for a walk, do sports, spend time alone and calm your mind.
- Be Patient. It is not always clear in which direction we want to go or who exactly we want to become. Take the time to uncover your true identity, build the new reality of your life and bury the old you.
- Trust yourself. Anyone who is used to seeing you in a certain way could resist your metamorphosis. It may be helpful to confront yourself with someone and talk with friends and family, but do not let yourself be influenced by others’ opinions.
- Stay clear. It is important not to act in moments when you are emotionally charged with impulses. Sometimes intolerance and frustration can lead to abrupt reactions. An emotional drive might make you take hasty decisions. Face your choices with logic and calm.
Whatever the new identity you want to give birth is, after reaching clarity and you gather the strengths to deal with guilt and fear, act. It is not rush, but determination. Procrastinating although knowing now well what you want, create a sense of suspense difficult to support, also for others.